Why covert narcissists are the most dangerous

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Covert narcissists are the sneakiest and most dangerous types of narcissists around.
The danger is in not seeing through the mirage of a covert narcissist, as they are more passive and conduct more calculated ways to destroy your life – piece by piece.
During the love bombing stage, at the beginning of a relationship with a covert narcissist, they will intensely pursue you, want to be around you 24/7 and give you constant compliments, buy you flowers and tell you you are the love of their life, their soulmate, their twin flame.



They lavish attention on their future victims and they move relationships forward very quickly, promising marriage, children and anything else you desire within days or weeks. Their goal is to get you addicted, hooked, dependent, and controlled by them before you find out you are dealing with a covert narcissist. These vile creatures are very good at keeping their targets off-balance and isolating them from family and friends. Covert narcissists constantly feel miserable and they project this onto their targets through their arsenal of manipulative weapons, and it is really difficult to break free.

Experts in personality disorders say: “the worst case among covert narcissists is the Punitive avenger: at this level, the narcissists have moved from lashing out at scapegoats to destroying their perceived enemies. This is where they descend into their dangerous and deranged level because you have a mixture of psychopathy, machiavellianism, and narcissism all operating. Their victim complex becomes delusional and takes on the role of judge, jury, and executioner.”
Covert narcissists despise themselves and will take on the role of the victim, all the while diarising their cunning plan to destroy your relationships with friends, family and to ruin your career and reputation.
They are intensely jealous of those who are funnier, more successful and more attractive than them and their jealousy will drive them to commit such horrific acts of abuse that the victim won’t be able to see what’s coming.



Covert narcissists feel defective and and they, as introverts, cannot stand it when their scapegoat is doing well and happy.
When a covert narcissist decides that you are too good for them they will start plotting their sinister smear campaign against you and they will smirk with satisfaction when they look at the trail of destruction they have left behind.
During the devaluing stage the covert narcissist will try to turn your friends and family against you, they will have you locked up, sectioned or push you to attempt suicide.

They are extremely sensitive to criticism and if you have ever said anything that they perceive to be an insult to them they will keep it inside for months and let it build up until one day they ‘snap’ and utterly try to annihilate you.
Covert narcissists must play the role of the nice guy to the outside world and if you dare expose them for what they are, they won’t stop trying to hurt you until you are dead.

They will blame the scapegoat for everything and feel truly justified in abusing them. They actually get off on hurting people and will feel superior and grandiose if they know the victim is in agonising pain.
Don’t underestimate the covert narcissist after a discard because they will always come back for more, pretending to offer you everything you’ve ever wanted.
The truth is though, these subhuman creatures are only hoovering their victims so they can unleash discard 2.0 – the ultimate annihilation.
Covert narcissists will goad you to commit suicide and if the victim does go through with it, they will lap up the attention they gain from your death and they will feel on top of the world!



A covert narcissist will do anything to protect their facade and they can be award-winning actors when it comes to faking emotions, love and empathy.
The reason that covert narcissists are so dangerous is their level of stealth when it comes to cheating, lying and abusing their victims.
If they didn’t manage to destroy you during the first discard, they will come back just to twist the knife in. This can include going out of their way to make you homeless, destroy your career, goading you to commit suicide or having you arrested on false charges.

Covert narcs crave control and are far more vindictive than overt narcissists. They will pretend to love you and want to marry you – all the while carefully crafting out a plan to discredit you and make you look insane while they sneakily work on finding new supply.
If you’re happy, cheerful and positive, the covert narcissist will work in the background (through triangulation, gaslighting and any other sneaky means at their disposal) to try and bring you down to their level.
They hate the fact that you can feel genuine positive emotions and they will explode with psychotic rage if you dare reveal their true, pathetic self.
They thrive on playing underhand, behind the radar games and when they suffer from a narcissistic injury – a rejection, put down or ridiculing comment – they will become sadistic.

Since it can take a long time before their mask starts to crack, the subtle effects of their passive aggressiveness, their manipulation tactics and strategies have more time to grow and develop under the radar. A co-dependent or empathic partner will not realise what is going on for a long time, if at all.
The effects will be a slow erosion on the victim’s self esteem and once they are discarded, they will feel the full wrath of the narcissist who will attempt to take everything that was important to you, away from you.

The evil covert narc will use a person’s weaknesses to cause them pain, and the more they beg and plead for them to stop, to please be nice, to please be humane, the more the narc’s despicable behaviour continues.
The abuse will follow in the guise of ‘poor me, I am the victim here,’ while projecting all of their behaviour onto the target.
Coverts will garner narcissistic supply from smear campaigning, gaslighting and enjoy seeing their target’s life, career, livelihood and social circle crumble.

They particularly enjoy discarding / abusing you on special occasions such as birthdays, Christmas or other holidays – and will discard you after you are diagnosed with a life-threatening illness, after you lose a child, when you are grieving or when you have just lost your job.
Kim Saeed, an expert on narcissistic personality disorder, explains: “Narcissists take pleasure in executing devastating discards at the worst possible times, and there’s a reason behind why they enjoy it so much. In fact, they are acutely aware of what they are doing, and it has absolutely nothing to do with you as an individual.

“Narcissists discard their primary supply sources during the worst possible times to triangulate and form trauma bonds with them, ensuring they never forget the narcissist or the relationship. All other narcissistic manipulations aside, these two devastating tactics alone are enough to instill PTSD and a myriad of other psychological injuries. Some victims are misdiagnosed as having Bipolar disorder when they are actually experiencing symptoms of repeated abandonment trauma.”

Many victims of covert narcissists report that they had every single part of their life destroyed by their abuser. Once the mask falls off during a discard, victims will be horrified when they see the true person behind this.
One common sign that shocks the victim most is noticing the smirk of evil in the covert narc’s delight as their victim falls. They will laugh when you cry, gloat when you suffer and replace you in an instant with no regard whatsoever for your wellbeing.

Covert narcissists are gravely dangerous because they insidiously abuse over time and they will invest mass amounts of time on inflicting pain on you and creating mass destruction.
Their favourite hobby is to abuse you and see you falter and they will think up new ways every day in trying to cause you uttermost pain.
They are devils behind closed doors, so if you do something to tarnish their image and they will find ways to pay you back that will not be traceable back to them. Covert style.

Styletto Mag is a Scottish online magazine that publishes the latest articles on fashion, beauty, travel, food and relationships. The site was founded in August 2011. Styletto Mag is a sleek, easy to access online magazine which features shopping trends, beauty reviews, funny features, and women's lifestyle articles. To contribute or submit articles, send them to editor.styletto@gmail.com.

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